I told you I love you once, twice, and many times after but did I tell I hate?! Did I tell you the sight of you nauseate me ?! Did I tell you the smell of you irritates me ?! Did I tell you, I hate your voice and I hate my name when you call for me?! Did I you, loving you was a mistake, I'll pay it's price for the rest of my life?!
I hate you as much as I loved you. I hate you as much as the tears I shed for you and myself. I hate you from the beginning till the end. I hate all my memories of you. I hate the ground you walk on. I hate the air you breath. I hate everything I loved about you.
Did I tell you how much I hate you ?!
I want to peel my skin off, because I can still feel your touch. I want to shave my head, because I can still feel your fingers in between my hair. I want to burn my lips until nothing left, because I can still feel your kiss. If I can take my heart out too, I would, because you touched it like no one before you ever did.
I went back to read every word I wrote about you, and I wish I could take it all back. Take away the good and the bad, I need nothing of those memories.
I started to pretend, I'm over you. Fooled everyone around me but not as much as I fooled myself. Up until I saw you walking down the hallway, then my heart started to race. With each step you toke toward me, I could feel my heart beat harder and harder. Then you pass by me as if I was a stranger. Now, I start to forget the good part of you. My heart beats start to slow, until I feel it turn to stone. All the good things we shared wasn't worth fighting for, at lest not to you. As you walk away with each step you take, I can feel the love for you fades away. I can feel my heart die again...
I refuse to shed a tear for you. I refuse to shed a tear for me, for I'm too strong, and too brave to be broken by you. I'm worth the smile and you are definitely, not worth the pain.
I started to pretend, I'm over you. Fooled everyone around me but not as much as I fooled myself. Up until I saw you walking down the hallway, then my heart started to race. With each step you toke toward me, I could feel my heart beat harder and harder. Then you pass by me as if I was a stranger. Now, I start to forget the good part of you. My heart beats start to slow, until I feel it turn to stone. All the good things we shared wasn't worth fighting for, at lest not to you. As you walk away with each step you take, I can feel the love for you fades away. I can feel my heart die again...
I refuse to shed a tear for you. I refuse to shed a tear for me, for I'm too strong, and too brave to be broken by you. I'm worth the smile and you are definitely, not worth the pain.
Now, I'm free, no hatred left for me to feel. No pain and no sorrow left, only the memories and some lessons for the future...
these words are breaking me.. Amani i haven't even imagined the words can tell our pain in such a way... your pen delight the night... :)
ReplyDelete:D I'm glad it touched you but dont give up dear !
DeleteMen cannot recognize happiness when it pass on there way, some of them may take a chance but as soon as they feel that they start to actually love u they run a way, Man up cowards :(
ReplyDeletethere is a really few number we can say 1-2% of then only who are brave and smart enough to grape the girl they love and never let her go, am not exaggerating the percentage is actually real
M.S thats just life dear, we live, love, and move on :P
Deletethat's why i don't believe in love specially in this century, and even if it's there, i don't believe i will ever feel it and i thank allah for that ;)
ReplyDelete